How many times have you seen a woman ask someone in her 90s what she would write in a letter to her younger self? The answers often sound like:

“I would have worked less and played more. I would have taken the riskier job. I would have studied abroad. I would have met more people. Loved more people.”

But here’s the truth:
We don’t have to wait until we’re 90 to write that letter.

Those reflections often come with regret and would haves. And yet, at the time, each of those women made the best decisions they could with the context of their lives. The lesson for us is this:

We can write these letters now. We can check in with ourselves at any point in our lives.

Doing this gives us a moment to pause, reflect, and ensure we’re heading down a path aligned with who we are and who we’re becoming. It helps us set intentions while we’re living the life, not after most of it has passed.

As Socrates said:
“The unexamined life is not worth living.”

So let’s not just write a letter to our younger selves — let’s also write one to our current selves. And imagine reading these letters over the years. Here is mine:

Dear Peggy,

You did your best with the circumstances you were given. You were quiet, and people didn’t always know how to love you or help you build on your strengths. You pushed through struggles children shouldn’t have to face, and you missed out on things that create a safe, nurturing childhood.

But you grew into a girl/woman who challenged the limits others placed on you through sheer determination — the “I’ll show you” mentality. That fierce resilience is still yours if you choose to use it.

Stand in your power.
Tell people who you are and what you think.
Let others know how you need to be loved.

Take more personal risks.
Shine brightly — and if others can’t handle it, hand them sunglasses.

Be patient, soft, and kind. Sometimes you get hard because life required it. Lean into your feminine side. Wear the pinks and yellows you love. Have more faith — a lot more.

It’s okay to want more or to like nice things, but they don’t define you.

Be fabulous in the spaces willing to receive it, and walk past the spaces that aren’t.
Figure out your next great thing and dive into it headfirst.

Find more people who share your passions.
REST when you need to.
Don’t be so hard on yourself — no one is perfect, and you are no exception.

Travel more. Meet more people.
You’re 58 — it’s now or never for some things, and too late for a few others.
Start today. What are you waiting for?

Your Turn

What would your letter look like?

  • What would you say to your younger self?
  • What needs to shift in your life today?
  • What positivity do you want more of?
  • What are you waiting for?

Write your letter — maybe even write it twice to tap into your most authentic feelings and the shifts you’re ready to make.

I would love to read your letters, and perhaps even showcase a few for our readers.

Have a wonderful day.